I Am Thankful….

There is no organization to this post. I just thought I would share an entry from my personal journal. I know a lot of what I blog here is negative, but despite my sadness I am thankful for a great many things. Just a few of them are listed below.

I Am Thankful for:

  1. Jason, despite our shortcomings as a couple he tries so hard to make me happy.
  2. Friends who don’t judge me, they just love me.
  3. The roof over my head, especially during these trying times. That kindness is far more than I deserve.
  4. Sunshine after a gray day.
  5. The beauty of watching the leaves change.
  6. The smell of a crisp fall morning.
  7. Music that helps to heal my soul.
  8. All the men and women who fight for my freedom, without it there would be no blogging,
  9. The memories that my grandma left me of being her little helper. I always had her unconditional love no matter what I did or did not do.
  10. The love that my grandfather gave to me when I would let no other man so close, and the legacy that he left behind.
  11. Being named after both my grandpa (Sam) and my grandma (middle name Marie). I have always treasured that connection and I still do.
  12. The birds that sing in the morning and the sunshine spilling in through my window.

I could go on for many pages but what I am most thankful for is that even though I feel like I am sinking in quicksand most of the time God hasn’t let me drown. Despite  the way I have raged at God over things that aren’t fair and how life shouldn’t be this way and even though I have said and done some very unchristian like things God is still holding me up. It has to be him, because I lost that ability  long ago.

I am thankful for my continued Hope and Faith as I pray (beg) for Peace.

Stay close by My side,
Keep your eyes on Me,
Though this life is hard,
I will give you perfect peace,

In this time of trial,
Pain that no one sees,
Trust me when I say,
I will give you perfect peace,

And you’ll never walk alone,
And you’ll never be in need,
Though I may not calm the storms around you,
You can hide in Me,

Burdens that you bear,
Offer no relief,
Let Me bear your load,
Cause I will give you perfect peace,

Stay close by My side,
And you’ll never walk alone,
Keep your eyes on Me,
And you will never be in need,
Though this life is hard,
Know that I will always give you perfect peace,
I will give you perfect peace…

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