My Love of Music

I can’t remember exactly when I started to love music, but I know that I was young. My mom is a music lover so I suspect it was while I was still in the womb. I use to sing all the time when I was a teenager grandpa was found of  asking, “Samantha Marie, who sings that song? Of course I always knew that answer and I would innocently recite the artist and song to which he would reply, “alright then you best let them sing it”. I still laugh thinking about this because I can recall so many times grandpa would video tape me doing nothing more than sitting in a little red rocking chair singing to him. Until it was innocently brought to my attention recently I hadn’t realized that my singing has mostly stopped. Someone else told me it was my way of expressing joy and that I just wasn’t feeling joyful anymore. To think like that makes me sad, but I have faith that it will not always be this way. I have come a long way and these next 3 months will be hard between Christmas, New Years, and especially February that will mark one year since our angel was born sleeping. Sometimes, I think about the days ahead and it’s just too much to bear but I have come this far and I can’t quit now.

So, for the first time this Season I am listening to Christmas music. Not a lot, just a few here and there, but I must share my all time favorite Christmas song with you now.

Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee;
I wrote to you
With childhood fantasies.

Well, I?m all grown-up now,
And still need help somehow.(can you still help somehow)
I?m not a child,
But my heart still can dream.

So here?s my lifelong wish,
My grown-up christmas list.
Not for myself,
But for a world in need. 

No more lives torn apart,
That wars would never start,(and wars would never start)
And time would heal all hearts.
And everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end.
This is my grown-up christmas list.

As children we believed
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely
Wrapped beneath our tree.(wrapped beneath the tree)

Well heaven surely knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal
A hurting human soul.

No more lives torn apart,
That wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
And everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end.
This is my grown-up christmas list.

What is this illusion called the innocence of youth?
Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth.
(there?d be)

No more lives torn apart,
That wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
And everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end, oh.
This is my grown-up christmas list.

This is my grown-up christmas list.

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