40 Days of Thankfulness: Day 14: Strength

Earlier today I had what would be many moments of weakness. I get angry, I cry, I rant, I rave, I scream and yes I even at times feel the need to hit something. I share private moments, I talk too much, I feel too much and sometimes I even over-react. I have many moments of remorse, but I have learned something important from each moment I regret. There are also many things I do not regret that some people might feel I should. I am a woman built of strength because of all of these things and more.

I’m gonna love myself more than anyone else
Believe in me, even if someone can’t see
The stronger woman in me

  • I have survived stillbirth. Some people think I talk about it too much and have said so. I have also told all of those people to kiss my ass. There are just somethings I can not hold back and if that makes other people uncomfortable that is their problem.
  • I am emotional, and i used to think this was a weakness. Life has taught me it takes a stronger person to put things out there, and boy do I ever put things out there.
  • More than anything I have discovered that I am a survivor, not a victim.
  • I come from a long line of strong women. My great-grandmother was a raging bitch, my grandmother remains to date the kindest person I have ever met but she had a backbone of steel, and my mother is stronger than I think I could ever be. I may feel like I have survived a lot, but not only did these women go through their own hardships they each taught me what strength looks like.       I will tell you one thing strength does not look like…SILENCE.

    I guess you could say I’m one of those girls
    That’s always been with one of those guys
    You know the type
    Like right now, he sleeps while I write

    But it’s better than crying
    I’m worn out from trying
    From loving a man who always makes it clear
    I’m not welcome here
    Just when he’s hungry or frisky
    or needs something cleaned
    And you know what I mean

    But not tonight
    ‘Cause come the morning light, oh
    I’m gonna love myself more than anyone else
    Believe in me, even if someone can’t see
    The stronger woman in me

    I’m going to be my own best friend
    Stick with me till the end
    Won’t lose myself again, never, no,
    ‘Cause there’s a stronger woman,
    A stronger woman in me

    Light bulbs buzz,
    I get up
    And head to my drawer
    I wish there was more
    I could say
    Another fairytale fades to gray
    I’ve lived on hope
    Just like a child
    Walking that mile
    Faking that smile
    All the while
    Wishing my heart had wings

    Well from now on I’m going to be
    The kind of woman I’d want my daughter to be, oh

    I’m gonna love myself more than anyone else
    Believe in me, even if someone can’t see
    A stronger woman in me
    I’m gonna be my own best friend
    Stick with me till the end
    I won’t lose myself again, never, no
    ‘Cause there’s a stronger woman,
    A stronger woman

    This is me, packing up my bags
    And this is me, headed for the door
    And this is me, the best you ever had
    I’m going to love myself
    More than anyone else
    Believe in me even if someone cannot see
    There’s a stronger woman in me
    I’m going to be my own best friend
    Stay with me till the end
    Won’t lose myself again, never, no
    ‘Cause there’s a stronger woman
    A stronger woman
    There’s a stronger woman,
    A stronger woman in me,
    Yeah…

     

Advertisements