In Just One Week…

foreverchanged

It is hard to believe that in 7 days it will have been 2 years since my angel was stillborn but born still. Last year I completely checked out to the point where I barely remember the day. I was a zombie and I decided I don’t want to be that person. So, this year I am having a girls lunch with some of my closest friends who have supported me in some of my darkest moments. I am hoping that being surrounded by my friends will give me the strength to get through the day. Grief is a funny monster. Even when I seem happy I am sad and most often my instinct is to hide myself away. Here is to starting new traditions and fighting that urge to hide away from those who love me most. A friend recently said that motherhood has changed her and I can’t help but think why people don’t understand that Maggie changed me. The only difference is I don’t get to hold my child. Forever Changed. There is no better way to say it.
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She remembers the change in her body
The blooming within
And how her heart seemed to flutter with the wind
Then one night as the days grew longer
That Indian summer
She brought love into the world
Cried and held me then

 

Forever Changed—Carrie Underwood

he remembers the nights he’d come calling
His yellow-silk tie
In love she saw him falling for her in the fire of July
Then one day as the nights grew longer
Blackberry winter in a little white church
Stood a young pretty bride

[Chorus]
Forever changed,
Forever changed,
Nothing ever stays the same
Forever named,
Forever changed

She remembers the change in her body
The blooming within
And how her heart seemed to flutter with the wind
Then one night as the days grew longer
That Indian summer
She brought love into the world
Cried and held me then

[Chorus]
Forever changed,
Forever changed,
Nothing ever stays the same
Forever child,
Forever changed

Somedays she’ll talk about aunt Rosie
The sister she lost
Asking when she’s coming over
And why she hasn’t called
Somedays I just hold her fragile hand
As time creeps across the floor
Somedays it just kills me
To watch her memories slip away a little more

[Outro]
Forever changed,
Forever changed,
Nothing ever stays the same
Forever named,
Forever child,
Forever loved,
Forever changed.

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